Show Me Pleasure, Show Me Pain
by Lis123
Summary: After being sexually rejected by Edward time and time again. Bella goes to Jasper for a favor. She is hoping to get some sexual relief.
1. Chapter 1

A hurried knock came from the front door. It wasn't a family member I knew that much. If it were, they wouldn't have knocked, they would have bargained in. That left only one person, Bella.

I swung open the door in two seconds flat. Vampire speed really did have its advantages. Bella stood in front of me with a look of surprise, a piece of hair covered part of her left eye. I felt a strange urge to fix the disobedient strain. However I fought the impluse keeping my pale, stony-like hands to my sides not wanting to be rude or intrusive.

The look in Bella's eyes told me she came for a purpose. One of which I wasn't sure about but whatever the reason, it made her feel nervous and embarrassed.

I thought of sending her a wave of calm but I knew from past experiences Bella didn't like me messing with her emotions. She was a rare individual that actually liked to feel hurt and pain. She showed signs of being a masochist. Much like I did during my early years with Maria.

It was funny how much Bella and I had in common yet I never bother to see that. In fact, I never hung out with Bella, not unless the whole gang was around and even then no one could pry her grips from Edward. She was like a sick little puppy following him around. It made me what to puke every time I saw them together.

I didn't know what it was; there was just something about them as a pair that rubbed me the wrong way. They didn't seem much like a couple to me. It almost felt like... well... like Edward was Bella father, protecting her from harm and she was a lust sick little teenager. They didn't know real love. They wouldn't know it if it hit them on the head.

I snickered to myself at the thought before returning my attention back to Bella who was still looking at me like a deer in headlights.

"Edward's not here." I said dully, starting to close the door.

Bella's small hand pushed against the door in protest.

"I know, I'm not here to see Edward, I'm here to see you." She confessed.

I raised an eyebrow in curiosity as Bella blush a light pink. A couple years ago, such a reaction would have had me pouncing on Bella, draining the very blood that brought color to her pale form. Fortunately, I was able to control my temptations now.

I still had reaction to the scene though, my hands balled in a fist causing my sharp nails to dig in my dead flesh. I could feel the venom building in my mouth causing me to have to take a gulp to remove the liquid and I could feel the desire build up inside, making my form tense up. What's more, I could feel Bell's emotions coming off of her. The nervousness, the fear, the excitement.

**The excitement?**

I gave her a questioning look as I calmed my senses.

**Did she have a death wish?**

**Is that why Bella was here? **

**Did she want me to turn her because Edward refused too?**

"Jasper I have a favor to ask." She said nervously.

**Since when did Bella need or want something from me?**

"Really? I'm intrigued, go ahead." I answered, leaning my body against the door.

"Can I come in first? it's kind of cold out here." Bella voiced, rubbing her shoulders to get warm.

"Of course, how rude of me, please come in." I said gesturing to the couch that sat in the living room.

Bella cautiously made her way inside, inspecting everything as she did, as though she had not seen it all before. She had, many times. Maybe it was a nervous habit of hers or maybe she thought she was being ambushed. It amused me to no end. She certainly had a vivid imagination.

We were alone. My family had gone off hunting. I stayed behind to keep an eye on the place. Luckily for Bella, I had just hunted recently so I was not a danger to her, not yet anyway.

"So, tell me about this favor of your Bella." I stated across the room, giving her some space, just to be on the safe side.

"You know already, don't you? I mean, isn't it obvious?" She asked, blushing yet again.

If she didn't stop blushing soon, I was not going to be accountable for my actions. I closed my eyes and held back a groan I felt building inside. I felt the sensation of desire and excitement hit me but the odd thing was it wasn't coming from me at all. My eyes popped open in shock and I refocused my attention to the task at hand, finding out what Bella wanted, so she could get out harm free before I snapped.

"Bella, I can read emotions, I can't read thoughts. You're confusing my gift with Edward's."

"Oh, right." She expressed, blushing still.

"Stop blushing now or else I will attack you." I announced, finding my willpower slipping.

Bella let out a frightened gasp and her heart beat sped up. She might as well as have been ringing a dinner bell. I closed my eyes and licked my lips just imagining what her blood must taste like. It smelt incredible.

"Do you get pleasure from it, feeding on someone?" She suddenly asked causing me to come back to the situation at hand.

"If it wasn't pleasurable, do you think we would be drinking blood?" I asked amused.

"I mean, do you get sexual pleasure out of it?" She asked intrigued, her nervousness was out the door.

Her eyes filled with lust and curiosity, maybe they were mirroring mine.

"Why do you want to know?" I asked, slowly stepping closer to her.

"I don't know, it's just, Edward doesn't want me sexually, and I thought maybe your kind only get off on blood."

I busted out laughing at Bella's ridiculous assumptions. All feelings of lust and desire left me and I was taken over by Bella's self-doubt. I took a seat next to her on the sofa and gave her a small smile in comfort.

"Bella, yes, we get pleasure from blood but the pleasure from blood and the pleasure from sex are two different kinds of pleasures. Unless of course you combine the two. It makes for a killer orgasm." I voiced smirking, remembering the shared sexual experiences I had with Maria.

I watched as Bella bit her lower lip, taking in everything I was saying to heart, as if I inspired her.

"Why do you ask Bella?"

"I want to know that feeling. I want to know what it is like… pleasure… and I want you to show me."

I swiftly moved off the couch and away from Bella. I was not expecting that response and from her of all people.

"Bella, I love Alice and you have Edward." I stated, trying to stay calm.

"I know, I don't mean actually do anything. God, I could never do that. I just want to feel pleasure. Can't you send out some waves of pleasure to me?" She asked nonchalantly, as if what she was asking for was innocent.

"Bella, you can't just feel pleasure. Let me rephrase that, in order for me to send out waves of pleasure I have to feel it. There is more that goes into this emotional control then you think."

"Well, what about blood? You get pleasure out of it. What if I cut myself and you send waves of lust and…"

"No! Forget it Bella, you do that and you're as good as dead." I warned.

"Please, Please Jasper. Edward won't help me and I'm hurting. You don't know what it's like to see something so beautiful as Edward flaunted in my face day in and day out and I can't touch him. It's pure torture. Could you at least try it?"

"Fine, but I can't promise you success or a happy ending."

"Oh thank you Jasper, should we get started?" Bella asked eagerly, getting up from the couch.

I backed away from her, holding my hand out to stop her from coming any closer.

"Bella, not now. You can't know when it is coming. If we do this, it is on my terms and my time, understand?"

"Yes sir." She said jokingly, to bad my dick didn't know she was or maybe it just didn't care as it grew in size.

Luckily Bella was too busy celebrating her success to notice. I was quick to send her on her way and told her to expect me later in the week. Though I didn't tell her what day or time to expect me. The surprise was the key to making it work.

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><p>I spent my nights alone, avoiding Alice's sexual seductions night and night again. I had to be desperate and horny for this to work. Alice was a tiger in bed and wore me out time and time again; I knew playtime with her had to end if Bella's sexual tension was to be released and an enjoyable relief at that.<p>

I waited a good three days. I waited for Edward to leave Bella high and dry from one of their intense make out session which only lasted a few minutes before Edward's lust for Bella's blood became too much. The poor girl was teased night and night again.

It was now my mission to help the poor helpless soul that slept in her bed, cuddled against her pillow, probably wishing it was Edward instead of a cushy pillow. Muffled moans began to erupt from her small, pouty lips, followed by pants. Edward did a good job at making Bella horny. I had yet to use my gift and she was already moaning away and dry humping a pillow. I would have found the scene humorous if it wasn't so sad.

I watched amused as Bella's small form toss and turned, trying to get comfortable. She was horny and edgy which made me mirror her feelings. My dick stood in attention and I found it hard to concentrate, to stand in one place. I wanted to feel a solid body against mine so badly, feel heat, and feel sweet relief. I could now understand what Bella was talking about, the feeling of having no one; not being able to be touched or to touch someone else was torture.

I felt my hands slide down my clothed chest, down to my waist and grip my dick on their own accord. I moaned as my fingers squeezed my shaft, feeling it swell under my touch.

Bella suddenly moaned out loud. My eyes dropped down to her thin tang top, the material did little to hide her breast, her nipples were hard as rocks and protruding from underneath the thin cloth, silently begging to be pulled and licked.

I fixed my grip on my straining dick, giving it a light massage as I eye Bella's quivering form. Her hands gripped onto the sheets, turning her knuckles white. Her legs kicked the covers free from her lower half; I could smell her aroused thick in the air.

I quickly unzipped my pants unable to stand anymore pain and began to jerk my dick at the sight in front of me.

Bella's forehead crinkled up in pleasure, her back arch up, pushing her chest up and her hips began to push forward, as if humping the air.

I increased my speed, causing Bella to moan louder, the bed began to creak from her fast, rough movements.

"Uh, yeah, yeah…" She moaned out in another world.

I felt a growl threatening to escape my lips when suddenly there where footsteps. I zipped up my pants and make quick work hiding in the closet. Bella was sweating and panting heavily when Charlie rushed in her room.

"Bella, are you okay?" He asked coming in to comfort his daughter.

Bella blushed embarrassed and wiped the sweat off her clammy forehead with her hand.

"What, what happened?" She asked, a little light headed, covering her sweaty and clingy clothes with her covers.

"You had a nightmare. Shh, go back to sleep, you're okay." Charlie answered, closing the door behind him.

Bella looked down at her aroused body and then around her room, suspiciously.

"Jasper?" She whispered, not wanting her dad to hear.

I slowly came out of hiding to find Bella all flushed and still very much turned on.

"I'm glad it's you. I thought I was losing my mind for a moment there."

"No, just having one hell of a sex dream." I teased.

"Umm, about that… can we finish?" She asked nervously.

"What about your dad?"

"I can be quiet." Bella insisted.

I stepped closer till I was at the end of her bed and leaned forward, supporting my weight with my hands on other side of the bed.

"Are you sure about that?" I teased, sending her another wave of pleasure.

Bella moaned and spread her legs. I quickly cover her mouth, which caused her to moan once more. I quirked an eyebrow, intrigued by her kinky style. I smirked and slid into her waiting arms. She muffled a moan feeling my weight pressed against her and was quick to wrap her arms around my waist.

"You like pain Bella?" I asked yanking on her hair with my free hand. She went crazy, moaning against my hand and shifting her hips into my stationary ones.

It didn't help that I was equally turned on now, with my dick brushed up against her covered pussy begging for entrance. I could only imagine how wet and warm she was. I gave her a quick thrust of my hips and she moaned like a whore, trying to bring me closer to her.

"Please, Jasper, it hurts." She mumbled against my hand.

"But that's what makes it feel so good, doesn't it?"

Another moan and thrust of her hips answer my question. I decided to stop teasing and throw caution to the wind. I moved off her, which she in return gave me a pout and I locked her bedroom door.

"We don't want daddy dearest walking in here now do we?" I said strolling back over.

She nodding in agreement and watched me undress, captivated by my naked, sculpted form. I crawled on top of her, pulling her body down till it was where I wanted. I looked her clothed body over with hungry eyes before ripping Bella's shirt and underwear, breaking her body loose from its cotton prison.

Bella's eyes lit up at my rough style and eagerly wrapped her legs around my waist. I had other plans for her. I broke her hold on me and flipped her over, rubbing my hard dick against her curved ass. She moaned and gripped the covers under her, waiting for me to start my attack. I played with her breast taking a handful in each hand, sending more waves of pleasure.

"Uh… Jasper please."

I pressed my dick harder against Bella back side, not penetrating, just dry hump the slit of her ass. Her tight cheeks gave great friction against my strained member. I wouldn't dare take Bella virginity away, that was Edward's but that didn't mean we couldn't do other things.

I hissed at the friction, rubbing hard and faster. I put one hand in Bella's hair yanking at it every now and then while the other moved down to rub her aching pussy.

"Oh god, right there, mmm, uh… don't… don't stop, so… so close."

I growled in her ear and lazily licked her neck. She whimpered and did something shocking. Bella arched her neck to my lips, granting access.

I could feel the venom pooling in my mouth.

"I want to bite you so badly." I whispered harshly in her ear.

"Oh, don't stop, I'm gonna cum."

I lightly bite her neck, amazed at my control not to bite deeper. A little bit on blood seeped out. I greedily licked and sucked the spot; giving Bella's a huge bruise. She didn't seem to mind; in fact it got her off pretty good.

A few more thrust against her ass and sucks on her neck had my sperm spraying her back side and covers. Bella's form slump against the bed, exhausted, sore and most importantly fulfilled.

"Oh wow, that was, wow. I won't be able to walk for a week."

I snickered at Bella's amazement.

"Glad I could help."

"Really?" She asked arching an eyebrow.

"We have more in common than I thought possible. We both love a mixture of pleasure and pain."

"So, you want to go again?" Bella asked hopeful.

"I should get back, Alice is expecting me and you have Edward coming in a couple of hours. You should clean up. We vampires can smell arousal, more importantly, we can smell other vampires."

Bella frowned a little at this.

"Well, when can we meet up again?"

"Bella, I think you're missing the point of the whole arrangement. This was a onetime thing; we can't continue down this road, only bad things will come from it. I could slip and kill you and Edward and Alice would kill me if they found out."

"But you enjoyed it too."

"It was interesting. Look the sun it starting to rise, I got to go."

"Wait jasper, when will I get to see you again?"

"I don't know. I'm sure Edward will bring you by the house again soon."

"Fine, and when he does, I'll get lost, stumble into your room and have my way with you."

I laughed at Bella's stubbornness.

"Whatever you say Bella."

"You'll see, you'll be begging to have a taste of me."

"You are persistent; I don't know how Edward can have so much willpower. One day maybe he can teach me. Till then, I guess I'm stuck with thoughts of biting your neck and sucking your blood while you moan for more. Oh well, till next time." I said teasingly, grabbing ahold of the tree truck outside Bella's window.

"Okay now that was just cruel." She expressed, causing me to chuckle as I made my escape out into the wilderness.


	2. Chapter 2

**Note:** Yes, I decided to do a second chapter, now don't get too excited, the chances of this becoming a full blown story are rare, not to say I won't do a a part three but just don't expect a lot of chapters.

* * *

><p>It was a few days later that I was graced with Bella's presence, yet again. She was clinging to Edward's arm and giving him the usual lovesick looks as if he was all she needed to keep herself satisfied. I knew better.<p>

I held the secret of our little adventure deep inside of me, making sure neither Edward nor Alice would ever find out of Bella's and my recent activities. As for the lovely bruise I left on Bella's neck, it was healing quite well and it wasn't as noticeable as it was a few days ago.

According to Edward, Bella told him her neck injury was from a branch. Yes, that's right. She was walking alone in the woods when she passed a tree with long branches and one scratched and bruised her neck. She could have just said a bug bite her and she had a reaction of some sort, but no, a branch did it.

Edward was suspicious for two seconds but than remembered who he was questioning, the love of his life, innocent Bella and went along with her story. It was amazing how blind love made Edward.

I sat by Alice's side still completely devoted to the woman I loved as Bella gave me a look across the room, I knew the look very well, desire. To everyone around us, Bella seemed calm and content. I could see right through her act. She was aroused, tense and longing for some bedroom attention. Sexual needs Edward had obviously been ignoring.

I looked her over for the first time of the day, as Edward grabbed her attention back. Bella was dressed differently. She usually wore plain jeans and a t-shirt, very tomboyish but today… things were different.

Bella was wearing a knee high skirt. I arched an eyebrow at this. I didn't even know Bella owned a skirt. It had to have been my wife's doing.

"Did you dress Bella today?" I asked Alice.

A smile formed to her lips as she answered.

"Actually, she asked to borrow some of my clothes. Doesn't she look good?" She gushed proudly.

I scanned Bella's long, lean, milky white legs all the way up to the tank top the clung to her perky breast.

Bella glanced over in my direction feeling eyes on her. I gave her a knowing smile. I was well aware of the game she was playing and her weak attempts to lure me. If she thought dressing up like my wife would win me over she had another thing coming. Though, I did admire her fight.

That was the one thing that drew me to Bella, in a curious way. She was a fighter much like me. She had guts, I liked that.

There weren't many humans that would spend there every waking life with a bunch of vampires and not be fearful. The danger of it all, knowing how deadly our kind was almost seem to excite Bella oppose to scaring her. She definitely was a unique human being.

"Yes, but not as good as you would look in that getup." I replied honorably, giving Alice a quick kiss on the neck.

She giggled like a school girl and turned giving me a loved filled kiss on the mouth. I could feel her longing as her tongue lightly graze my lips wanting to deepen the kiss.

Though tempted to turn things up a notch, I had to remember we were out in public. I lightly tapped on Alice's shoulder, gesturing her to let up on the kiss. She sighed against my lips somewhat disappointment but backed away from my mouth agreeing it was not the best time or place for such acts.

Bella eyed us enviously from across the lunch table. I almost felt bad for her, almost.

Talk of the gang meeting up after school entered our table's conversation and not before long the bell rang signaling that lunch was over and we all headed off to our individual, schedule classes.

After parting from Alice I made my way through the crowded halls on my way to class. I was half way there when I had a strange feeling of being followed. I slowed down my pace and before I knew it Bella was walking with me side by side.

"Bella, Your class isn't down this hall is it?" I asked, trying hard to remember where Bella's next class was.

"No, we need to talk." She stated, stopping in her spot.

"Right now? Bella, we're going to be late for class."

I really didn't have to worry about my grades. They were sold A's, one of the perks of being able to repeat school over and over again. You learn everything by heart.

Bella on the other hand didn't have the advantage I did and her mind had a tendency to wander during school thanks to Edward being in most of her classes and capturing a good amount of her attention. Or so she argued when defending her grades to Alice on her last report card, which wasn't the best.

I heard Charlie grounded her for two week after that and forbid Bella to see Edward till she brought her grades up, of course that didn't stop Edward from sneaking into Bella's room at night for their usual make out sessions while Charlie slept.

"Yes, now, it's important. Come on, I know a place we can talk." She said tugging on my arm to follow her.

I made sure the coast was clear before following Bella to what looked to be a janitor's closet.

"You got to be kidding me, a closet, really Bella?" I disputed, not liking the look of the small quarters, or the fact that it was not the cleanest looking place.

"Well, this way we don't have to worry about prying eyes or having to explain to the others why we aren't in class at the moment. Come on." Bella claimed grabbing my hand and pulling me inside the small, dark room with her and shutting the door behind her, leaving us in the dark with barely any room to be comfortable.

"Jasper, I can't see. I can't see where the light switch is, can you?" Bella stressed, moving her hands around the dark space, hitting my arm and chest a couple of times in search of the light.

"Bella, stop moving. You're causing more damage than good." I stated getting a little frustrated.

"Sorry." She said in defeat, placing her arms by her sides as I search the black, crowded room for the hidden switch.

My hands went on the wall behind Bella, skimming the surface from something that felt like a light switch. I pressed Bella's body closer to mine, so I could get a better feel of the wall.

Bella gasped in surprised and gripped my waist to stable herself. I could feel her arousal come back, as she breathed on my neck, fanning me with her warm breath. I felt a shiver run down my spine as her warm body pressed against mine, heating me up in more ways than one.

"Yes!" I exclaimed, finding the control, and flipped it on.

In a matter of seconds, the once dark closet became full of light and lost its once tempting means of escape. It became more clear as the visibility came back just how close Bella and I were standing, and what little room we had to move in.

I looked around and found a stool in the corner of the room. I wiped the visible dust off of it and took a seat as Bella stood by the door. I started to rethink my actions as I realized my head was leveled with Bella's milky thighs. I leaned back on the bench, arching my neck back awkwardly, so I could give Bella eye contact.

"What did you want to talk about?" I asked, though having a pretty good idea what she wanted to discuss or should I say do.

"Do you not feel at all Jasper?" She asked frustrated.

"Yes, I feel."

"Then, do you really need to ask?"

"Bella." I voiced in a stern tone.

"You know what I want."

"Bella, you're playing with fire. If you're not careful you're going to get burned." I warned.

"I look forward to it." She voice seductively, raising her skirt up giving me a peek at her white panties.

The smell of Bella's arousal hit me full force. Against my liking I found my mouth filling with venom and my eyes darkening with desire. I leaned forward letting my nose graze against her cotton covered pussy inhaling her sweet aroma.

Bella let out a breath of air followed by a moan as I remove my nose and replaced it with my playful and curious tongue, placing pressure on the middle of her covered wetness.

One moan after another left Bella's lips and her hands clung to my shoulders for support, squirming under my tongues actions.

"Mmm Jasper… oh… so good."

I pulled back enough from Bella's crotch long enough to slide her underwear down her legs, revealing her pink, swollen, wet pussy to me. I dove in savoring her flavor as she cried out for more, pushing her hips into my face urging me on.

I cupped her ass pushing her closer letting my tongue move deeper into her wetness, licking and sucking on the heated, sensitive skin.

Bella's cries were loud and echoed in the small space we were in. The walls of her pussy clenched down on my tongue and her legs trembled as she came.

Bella rested her weight against the door completely exhausted as I licked her clean. Once done I pulled her panties back up and admired my work.

Bella was leaning against the door, spent. Her cheeks were flushed and she was winded. Her chest heaving as her heart pounded away, trying to slow its speed.

"Come on, we should get back to class." I said standing up noticing how unstable Bella was as she put weight on her feet.

I grabbed her waist to sturdy her.

"You okay?" I asked amused.

She smiled and nodded and before I knew it she pulled me into a spine tingling kiss that made the kiss I shared with Alice early, seem like child's play. I was speechless as she pulled away with a look of delight on her face.

"Thank you Jasper."

"You're… umm… you're welcome."

Bella fixed her skirt and turned around to open the door, brushing against my semi hard dick in the process. I stiffened a moan and fought the temptation to bend her over and have my way with her. I let Bella leave first, adjusted my jeans and waited a good ten minutes before heading off to class.


	3. Chapter 3

I'm taking a break from writing. I'm sorry all. I never thought I would be the kind of person to do this. However, I have a lot going on in my life at the moment. Writing is just not important to me at the moment. I'll have to wait and see if/ when it comes back. Right now, I need to focus on my real life. I hope you all understand and I appreciate all your support through my stories. I hope to return and finish them one day. Thanks again, Lisa.


	4. Chapter 4

I pulled back the long drapes that covered Alice's and my bedroom windows, staring at the scene happening outside the big Cullen house. I could see two figures verbally fighting out in the cold fall weather, Edward and Bella.

I was all alone. Alice left as soon as she caught wind of Bella and my sexual arrangements. She said she couldn't deal with the situation and that she couldn't stand to look at me at the moment and packed a bunch of her things and left without even telling me where she was going or when she would be back. Edward tried to stop her and in the process read her thoughts. Then all chaos broke.

* * *

><p>It all started off as a very calm Thanks giving day with Alice fixing the house up for a little family gathering. She always loved to decorate. We were all decked out in our best attire and in a cheerful mood.<p>

I stood next to the woman I loved whole heartedly, but my eyes strangely stayed on Bella's across the room. There were no sexual stares or gestures just calming, pleasant stares between us. It was as if we both realized how truly blessed we were with our love ones and that it didn't matter if we ever touch again, we would always have this close, misunderstood bond.

She looked beautiful with her chestnut colored hair flowing down her shoulders, a little blush and lip gloss enhancing her facial features and the dark blue knee high, spaghetti strap dress she wore. Bella didn't look like a girl anymore, she looked like a woman.

It was a proud moment to see what she had grown into over the course and which I had known her. I almost felt like a proud parent except with a strange sexual desire to bend her over the dinner table and have my way with her.

My eyes widened when I realized what I was thinking, feeling. It wasn't Bella's emotions I was reading off of anymore, they were mine. I, Jasper Whitlock, a happily married vampire, wanted my brother's girlfriend. I wanted Bella. I wanted her bad.

I watched across the room as Bella chatted away with my other family members, laughing at something said. Her breast, her perky, milky breast jiggled as she laughed. My eyes darken and I felt a jerk from my pants.

I gripped onto the corner of the table as Bella bent down to pick up a napkin she dropped, being the klutz that she was.

I held back a moan threatening to escape and tighten my grip on the wooden surface, surely leaving nail marks. Her ass was brought up to my view, her dress teasingly drew higher and higher as she reached for the napkin, giving me a better view of her long, lean milky legs and round ass.

I gulped hard as venom filled my mouth; my dick was straining to get out of its cotton hold. I was moments away from grabbing Bella, dragging her to my room and fucking her brains out.

That was until I remembered my wife, my beautiful, trusting wife I had standing right next to me, probably reading me like a book.

"Jasper, are you okay?" She asked in her sweet, concerned voice.

"Wha…yes, yes, I'm fine. I just… I need a little fresh air. Bella's scent is getting to me." I lied.

Not to say her scent didn't smell good, it smelt great and when she was aroused, dear lord, she was mouthwatering.

"Good, I think that is the smart thing to do. I'll be here, waiting for your return." She replied sweetly, removing my grip on the wooden table, giving my hand a loving squeeze.

I gave a tense smile her way before making my way out the back door into the night air, hoping to calm my senses.

* * *

><p>I closed my eyes inhaling the night air and listening to the sounds of nature. It calmed me a great deal and soon I was feeling more like my relaxed self.<p>

A moment of weakness, that's all it was, nothing more.

The sound of the glass door screeching open caught my attention. I looked over to find Bella's small form standing by my side.

"Oh, it's getting chilly out." She expressed, rubbing her arms to get some needed warmth.

I felt the need to take her and my arms and hold her close but I resisted, she wasn't mine to hold, she would never be.

That thought saddened me for some reason. I couldn't understand why I felt the need to comfort Bella, I never had before. Maybe because we were family and families comfort each other.

**Yeah, that must be it, we have grown closer, it's only nature to want to protect and be there for the ones you care for, except, there is a sexual lust as well.**

I eyed her body over as she looked out in the dark forest that surrounded us, completely oblivious.

Her nipples were hard and alert, begging for a warm touch and her cheeks were flushed from the cold air. Even her breathing became heavier, as if the cold was taking over her form, yet she didn't move from her spot or show any signs of weakness. She just stood next to me in silence watching the scenery.

"Bella, its cold out, perhaps you better head back inside." I voiced calmly.

"No. I'm fine." She replied trying to sound relaxed but I could hear the trembles in her words.

She was trying to fight the cold but it was winning. If she stayed much longer she would turn into a human Popsicle.

"Bella, come on, your shivering for Christ sakes. Go inside." I all but yelled.

**Why the hell is she outside with me anyway? Does she want Edward to find out about us or something?**

"No, not without you." She replied stubbornly.

I cursed under my breath as I grabbed Bella's arm not caring if I was hurting her or not and pulled her into the warm house.

I took her to the family library. There was a nice fire place in the middle of the room, perfect for warming her cold, fragile skin.

I pushed Bella against the wall rather roughly. She whimpered a little but didn't say anything.

I was mad at her and I wanted her to know she couldn't treat me this way. I wasn't some toy, some experiment. She couldn't use me when she wanted and throw me away. I wouldn't let her fuck up everything I worked so hard to gain.

"What are you trying to do, fuck everything up?" I disputed angrily.

Her eyes widened when she saw my seriousness on the issue. I watched shocked as they began to water and sobs came out of her mouth.

"I'm sorry, I guess I wasn't thinking, I just… I missed you, okay?" She sobbed into my chest, wetting my dress shirt.

I ran a hand through her hair and held her close with my other, as she went to.

"I never wanted this to happen; I didn't expect this to happen. I didn't think I would feel something for you, but I do."

"I know, I know. Shh, it's okay. We'll figure this all out. Okay?" I said in a calming voice, moving away to see her face.

Bella's eyes were blood shot and glossy from all her crying and her cheeks were flushed with color. She was beautiful, simply beautiful in her natural form, she had a beautiful soul. I could see why Edward loved her so.

I brought my hand up and wiped her tears. Her breathing slowed and our eyes met. She grabbed ahold of my hand stopping their actions and leaned forward. Before I knew what I was doing my lips meet hers in a soft, sweet kiss, which soon turned passionate and rough.

I pushed her small body against the wall. I groped ever part of her body I could get my hands on, her breast begging to be freed of their confinements, her squeezable ass, getting a moan in response, her arms, and hips, legs, everywhere.

Her small hands made quick work of my belt, flinging it across the room. I pulled back and admired her beauty, as her chest heaved for more and desire filled her eyes.

I yanked my shirt free from its tucked in state before ripping it in two, impatience and excited for what was to come. Bella reached down and slide her underwear off teasingly before tossing them to the side.

I pressed my hard body into hers and she moaned, desperately working on my pant zipper, wanting to remove the garments that stood between us.

A slow wicked smirk came across my face, at her needy state.

"You want me Bella?" I asked huskily against her neck, giving little kisses and sucks.

"Yes, yes, please."

"You want me to fuck you?" I said giving her neck a light nibble, while grinding against her lower half.

"Oh god, yes. I want you so bad. Please Jasper, Take me. Take me now." She whined wrapping a leg around my waist trying to bring me closer.

"Your wish is my command." I answered, grabbing her by the ass and moving across the room over to the fire place.

She squealed in joy and held on to me for dear life as I brought her down to lie on the carpet. She lay next to the fire all hot and bothered in desperate need of relief. It took everything in me not to just pounce on her.

I shed her of her dress and kissed her pink skin all over. She whined and whimpered for me to take her time and time again. I waited till she was at her breaking point before removing my pants and spreading her warm legs apart.

She gasped in anticipation and bit her lower lip as my hard dick slide into her wet and warm hold. She panted and grabbed ahold of my back. I closed my eyes and arched my back groaning at the great sensation as I filled her up. I felt whole, inside and out.

It wasn't long till Bella wrapped her legs around me and we were off in another world full of bliss.

It didn't take either of us very long to reach our peaks. I let Bella rest up, catch her breath and take in everything that had just happen.

"Congratulations, you're now a full blown woman." I said huskily against her ear.

A satisfied smile came upon her face and she watched my naked body with hunger as I took a seat on the padded chair that sat next to the fire place. My dick stood in attention, lovingly Bella's lustful gaze.

"Come here, little one." I voiced, gesturing Bella over with my finger.

She wasted no time coming over.

"You want to play horsey?" I asked huskily.

Bella nodded her head excitedly and bit her bottom lip again looking innocent and uncertain.

"How… umm… how do we play? I mean… what do I do?" She asked sounding confused and a little embarrassed at her lack of know how.

I smiled back at her to show I wasn't frustrated at her lack of knowledge in the bedroom and that I would guide her.

"Straddle my lap facing me."

Bella though hesitant did as told and gasp as my dick slide back inside her pussy.

"Now, just start moving, back and forth, up and down, whatever feels good to you."

Slowly Bella rose up and then slide back down in a forward slant. Moans escaped her at every rise and fall.

"Yeah…uh, that's it; just… oh fuck, just like that." I said gripping her waist and beginning to thrust up into her.

"Oh, oh, oh god, Jas, jasper."

"Yeah, that's it, ride the horsey. Uh, shit, so close to fucking close."

I watched in enjoyment as Bella's breast bounced up and down as her fast movements and her face grown pink with excitement and her mouth opening and closing unable to form words at the feeling.

"Jas, Jasssperrr!" She exclaimed, before becoming a pile of mush in my arms and struggling to catch her breath.

I could hear her heart pounding a mile a minute. I wanted to.

**You don't know how bad I wanted to change her, to keep her for my own selfish reasons but she is Edward's and I have Alice.**

Bella and I dressed in silence; I wasn't even sure how much time had passed since we left the party. I let Bella leave first.

* * *

><p>I left ten minutes later and headed to my room to change my shirt.<p>

I couldn't reenter the party with a torn shirt.

I was shocked to find Alice already there, waiting for me. Something told me I was not going to like what she had to say. It was written on her face. I could feel the betrayal, the hurt in her emotions.

"You heard." I said sure Alice knew about Bella and me.

"No, the walls are sound proof remember Jasper? Carlisle thought it would be wise to sound proof the rooms so we couldn't hear everyone's business."

"Right, so then how did you…?"

"I had a vision Jasper, I had it this morning. I thought my mind was playing tricks on me but then I saw the way you were looking at Bella…" She stopped short as if in too much pain to continue.

"… I remember when you used to look at me that way, so full of desire and…love."

"Alice, it wasn't like that. I was just helping her out. I will admit it went too far but in the end that's all it was, helping a friend out." I voiced taking a seat next to her on the bed, trying to take her hand in mine.

Alice tugged her hand free and moved off the sofa heading towards the closet, our shared closet.

"Oh come on Jasper, you think I'm stupid? I know there is something there between you in Bella and it's not just sexual, you can play dumb all you want, but I know there is more." She said grabbing her suitcase out of the closet and placing it on the couch opening it up.

"What are you talking about Alice, did you see something? What are you doing, where are you going?" I asked frantically, afraid of Alice never forgiving me.

"No, I didn't see your future. I just saw… I have to go; I can't even look at you right now." She said packing up some clothes and heading towards the door.

"Alice, please I love you. Please don't leave, not like this." I begged.

"I have to go, I can't… I just can't." She voiced heading out the door.

Voices downstairs could be heard, one in particular, Edward's asking Alice what happened. She didn't say anything out loud but in her mind I know she did because the next thing I knew I heard Edward leaving and Bella following after.

* * *

><p>I looked out my window to find them fighting out in the front yard. I could tell even from where I was that Bella was crying and shivering from the weather.<p>

**She forgot her damn jacket again.**

Edward was oblivious to her human needs or maybe he just didn't care as he ignored her trembling as she fought to tell him, he was all she wanted, needed, that she couldn't live without him.

Edward walked away after hearing enough, leaving her alone again. Bella attempted to follow him but gave up after falling over her clumsy feet in the dirt.

She was huddled up on the cold ground crying her eyes out.

**She is going to freeze to death.**

I let out a stressed sigh before heading downstairs to the rest of my family who stared on in shock. All of them voicing different things.

How could I do this to Alice and my brother and if I was okay? Telling me to make sure Bella was okay and to fix the mess I created.

Still shirtless, I headed over to the coat rack and grabbed Bella's jacket. I opened the front door without even answering my family's questions or looking in their direction and walked in the chilly weather over to Bella's quivering form.

Without saying a word I placed the jacket on her bare shoulders and scooped her up in my arms. She sobbed against my chest as I carried her inside the warmth of the house.

I placed her on the living room couch and pulled a small blanket over her before heading back to my room and shutting the door, ignoring my family's stares and words.


	5. Chapter 5

I'm sorry to do this to you guys a second time but… I'm leaving fanfiction for… I don't know how long. It's just not worth doing anymore, at least at the moment.

I have been writing solely for my own entertainment, as selfish as that may seem and It's not fun anymore or easy to come up with ideas and I have lost the will to try.

My life has become shitter and shitter; the guy I met online, who showed promised has pretty much abandon me. I'm heartbroken and I'm not sure if I'll ever truly heal from this experience.

Who knows, maybe one day, it will inspire me to write a story on this real experience.

Anyway, thanks for your support over the years, maybe one day I'll return. Till then, take care.

Lisa

P.S. if you were curious how the stories I was working on were going to end you can email/comment me and I'll tell you what my plans were.

Thanks again and good luck with your own struggles in life.


	6. Chapter 6

**Note: I might do one more chapter, I'm not sure yet.**

* * *

><p>"Jasper, you have to do it, Bella won't last much longer like this." Carlisle insisted from across the room.<p>

"If Bella's wish is to die who am I to deny her that?" I grumbled.

"Jasper, why are you making this more difficult than it has to be. I know you care for her, we all do. Why are you making her suffer?"

"I didn't do anything wrong. Bella was the one who asked for it. Now because of her I lost my brother's trust and my wife's love. So why should I help her?" I all but growled.

"You've changed too, you know? You haven't hunted in weeks, you planning on dying yourself?" Carlisle claimed coming closer.

I harshly laughed at his words.

"Planning to die? How can I die, I'm already dead, remember?"

"You still have a soul Jasper. Just because you can't see it, touch it or feel it, doesn't mean it isn't there. You still have a chance to do the right thing here."

"The right thing, and what is that?"

"Changing Bella into one of us."

"You honestly think I could change her without killing her completely?"

"I have faith in you son. You have more strength than you give yourself credit for."

* * *

><p>After much debated and self-doubt I headed downstairs to where Bella's weak form was sitting.<p>

She was still on the same couch I had placed her many weeks ago. Her complexion was paler then usual and she was skin and bones. Her once comfortable fit clothes were swimming on her, her eyes lacked life and her cheeks were sunken in on the sides. She looked like a living skeleton.

I watched in the shadows as Esme tried to get Bella to eat some soup but she refused, holding her hand up in protest, claiming in a frail voice that she was no hungry.

The scene sickened me, she was clearly hungry, her body was crying out for food and proper attention but she was being stubborn and denying any self-enjoyment. Bella was punishing herself.

"Let me try." I said carefully taking a spot on the couch next to Bella.

Esme nodded, placing the bowl on the table and left us in silence.

"Do you want to die Bella?" I asked harshly.

"I don't care anymore; nothing matters anymore, not without Edward." She replied sadly, staring off in space.

"You have a choice Bella, you either eat some soup or I'm going to bite you. I will not have your death be on my conscience." I argued.

Without saying a word, without even giving me acknowledgement, Bella pushed her brown messy hair off her shoulder, exposing her neck to me.

"Go ahead and kill me than, I have no reason to live anymore." She voiced dully.

I sat there stunned as she closed her eyes and mentally prepared herself for the hurtful bite.

**She really wants to die… and I really need to feed.**

**It's a win, win situation.**

**I would be doing us both a favor.**

My mouth filled with venom as I eyed her blood flowing neck, watching closely as it pulse with every shallow breath she took, her heart no doubt had been working overtime these last few weeks, pumping double the amount of blood through her system, trying to fix the damaged caused from her malnutrition.

I took my time, moving closer to her tiny form ever so slowly, wanting to savor the moment as long as possible. It was music to my ears as Bella's heart beat quicken with every inch I crossed.

I closed my eyes, remembering what her sweet blood tasted like, I only had a sample of it once but it was enough to know her blood tasted like pure heaven.

I stomach grumbled at the thought and my nails dug into the sofa trying not to jump Bella. I promised myself I would make it as painless as possible for her. It was the only right thing to do. I did not want to return to the savage monster I once was with Maria.

I changed my ways when I met Alice, when I met the Cullen's and they became my family, when a human became a part of our extended family.

**Does Bella not care how this decision will affect all the people in her life?**

**Does she not know how it will affect mine?**

I drew closer and closer until my ice cold lips touched her lukewarm neck. I pressed my mouth against her pulse, trying to calm my senses. I could feel her boney frame against my stone one, I could smell her lovely scent against my nose and I could practically taste her on my lips.

I pulled back from her neck just enough to open my mouth and sink my teeth down into her. Bella gasped once and then her body went limp against mine.

I could have easily feed on her, sucked her dried but I resisted the temptation and pumped my venom in her veins.

Once down, I sealed the bloody wound giving it a few licks of my tongue before carefully laying Bella back down on the couch.

I watched her lay in peace as the venom worked its magic inside her body.

She really was special, if I had not known it before I knew it now.

I moved a strain of her brown hair out of her face and took a lifeless hand in mine.

"I'm proud of you son. I knew you could do it." Carlisle said coming up from behind, placing a comforting hand on my shoulder.

I dropped Bella hand instantly and moved off the couch.

"Proud? What have I done to be proud of, I lost a brother, a wife and I turned a friend all for my own selfish purposes. There is nothing to be proud worthy for what I have done, only shame and regret."

"Jasper…"

"Keep an eye on her, will you? I have to hunt." I voiced heading out of our big house and into the woods.

I needed to hunt yes, but I also needed time to think and figure out how to explain to Bella how I had betrayed her wish to die.

She had once wanted to be a vampire like us but that was when she had Edward by her side.

**With Edward gone would she still have wanted this life? **

**Would Bella have agreed to a forever without Edward?**

**Would she still want the life of a vampire knowing she would be dare I say, MY mate?**


	7. Chapter 7

I came back to find a beautiful stranger sitting in the very spot that Bella had been in before I left. I couldn't take my eyes off such a creature and it seemed she felt the same way about herself, as she looked herself over in complete amazement.

This female had long, rich chestnut hair with a hint of red to it, full of volume and waves, giving her strands life and movement.

She tugged on her hair examining the perfect strands; there were no split ends, no strand out of place. Her hair was thick, shiny and healthy.

She then turned her attention to her bare arms. Her skin was pale and youthful, it looked like porcelain, and there was not a freckle or age spot in sight.

At that moment she noticed the full length mirror across the room. She eagerly yet gracefully got up from her seat and glided over to see her entire physical appearance.

I got a good look at this female's body as she passed by, it was young and perky, curvy yet slim and her clothes fit her like a glove, showing off her well-shaped body.

Once satisfied with herself, she turned to head back when she noticed me in the room. She immediately froze in her spot when she realized she wasn't alone.

Her lips were full and had a touch of pink and her eyes were ruby red mixed with a dark brown.

It remained silent as I realized who this beautiful creature was before me.

"Bella?"

She had no expression on her face. I couldn't read her emotions. She looked so stunning yet so lifeless at the same time.

Suddenly I heard a growl, which I could only guess was from Bella's stomach as her next words were, "I'm hungry."

I lite up at her words, happy she wasn't asking for a fight. I'm sure she had many questions which I would surely answer but first she needed to feed.

"Okay, I'll get you something." I answered, practically speeding out the room to Carlisle blood collection.

I took a bag of blood poured it into a cup and headed back over to Bella, who eyed the substance curiously.

She took one whiff then grabbed the cup from me and downed it in two seconds flat.

I watched amazed at her speedy adjustment. Blood covered her mouth as she licked the cup clean and handed it back to me.

"Mmm." She moaned, licking the excess off her lips.

The scene was very arousing and even more when her eyes lit up in hunger and she uttered the word, "More."

I closed my eyes trying to shake out all the dirty images that were overflowing my thoughts at that moment.

I had to focus on teaching Bella the ways of life, the basic tools and training she would need to be successful and my sexual desire for her wasn't helping.

"Bella, you should take it easy. Your body is still getting used to being a…"

Bella's stomach let out a loud groan in protest, her eyes widened, her face winkled, little puffs of air came from her mouth and before I knew it, Bella puked all over her clothes and on the ground, It looked like a massacre.

"…Vampire." I finished.

Before I could offer my assistance, Esme came running over in worry.

"Bella!" She cried.

"I'm sorry Esme, I tried, I couldn't hold it in." Bella stressed, rubbing her upset tummy.

"Oh, that's okay dear, you will learn in time. Come on; let's go get you washed up." She insisted, leading my mate away.

I felt the anger and jealousy burning up inside of me. Bella was MY mate; it was My job to take care of her, no one else's.

"No, I'll clean Bella up." I commanded, moving over to take Bella's arm to lead her to the bathroom but my mother stopped me.

"I understand you want to help son but do you really think it is wise, in your current condition?" She asked, looking south.

I looked down to where her eyes lay, I had tented pants. I'm sure if I was still alive I would have been blushing.

Esme was right, there was no way in hell I would have been able to give Bella a sponge bath, soaping up her perky breast and pink nipples down to her sweet pussy.

**Fuck I'm horny.**

My mother was definitely right, it was almost impossible to resist your mate.

"Maybe your right. I'll work on cleaning this stain." I replied sheepishly.

"I'm sorry about the carpet Esme." Bella's sweet voice said, resting her weak form against my mother's hold.

"Shush, don't worry about it sweetie, come on, there's a bath with your name on it." She voiced leading Bella upstairs.

* * *

><p>I waited and waited, pacing the room for Bella's return. Her absence only lasted fifteen minutes but it felt like hours.<p>

I lit up as she entered my room, glad to have her back in my sights. My eyes widen as I realized what Bella was wearing.

She was wearing a white, sheer nightgown. It was easy to see Bella's hard nipples and the outline of her bare pussy.

Bella was basically wearing a transparent sheet and nothing else. She might as well as come to my room naked.

**Fuck me now! **

My dick grew and my pants got smaller, making it more difficult to move around.

"So, are you planning on training me on all things vampire?" She asked from across the room.

"That's the plan." I replied, giving her a calming smile trying to ignore my discomfort.

"Okay, then I want to start with fucking." Bella shockingly confessed.

I leaned back almost falling out of my chair in shock.

"Come again?" I questioned, hoping I was hearing her right.

Bella sexily swayed her hips back and forth as she proceeded over to where I was sitting. I was in awestruck.

"Rosalie and Alice used to tell me all the time how great vampire sex was. I want to test that theory." She claimed, stopping in front of my chair, spreading her legs apart so she could sit on my tented lap.

"Whh…what?"

"Jazz, do I have to spell it out for you? I'm horny and from the looks and feel of things…" She said grinding against my covered hard on.

"…so are you."

"Bella…" I warned, placing my hands on her hips to still her movements.

"…You don't know what you're asking for. Vampire sex is full of passion and almost hate. There is biting, clawing, pushing, pulling, tugging, ripping, crushing. You name it. You're too fragile for that."

"Jasper, you forget I'm not human anymore, I'm a newborn who can kick your ass if I wanted too."

"Maybe if you had more blood in you and training, but right now. You're weak Bell, too weak for rough sex."

"I'll be the judge of that. Now be good and give me what I want or I'll go to Carlisle or Emmett for what I need." Bella voiced huskily against my ear.

I growled in anger at the very thought. No one would have Bella but me. NO ONE.

She giggled in glee as I picked her up with ease and placed her against my dresser. I turned her to where her back was to me and placed her hands on the countertop letting her know to lean forward.

She did as instructed and spread her legs for easy access. I lifted her nightgown admiring her firm, round ass, giving it a squeeze and playful slap.

Bella moaned with need and brushed her ass against my hard on causing me groan as well.

"Naughty girl." I voiced huskily in her ear as I undid my pants and freed my eager dick.

I grabbed hold of her breast, palming them in my hands as I shoved into her with a mighty force.

Bella screamed out in pleasure as I rammed into her wet pussy over and over again.

"Yes, yes, uhhh…don't stop!"

"Yeah, you like that? This rough enough for you?" I huffed against her ear, dropping a hand down to play with her clit.

"AHH… JASPER!" Bella exclaimed before becoming limp over my dresser.

"UHH… YEAH!" I shouted giving her one last thrust before meeting my end.

I lay against her back equally as drain of energy, coming off my sex high.

Once I came to, I gave Bella's back a light kiss and helped her up. We fixed ourselves, till we both looked decent again and then Bella turned and gave me the best kiss of my existence.

It was soft, sweet, slow and full of feeling.

In those few minutes, I felt human again and I felt…loved.

I grabbed her waist, held her close and met her mouth with such passion and love.

It took a lot of heart break and deception to get here and I would do it again in a flash just to feel a moment of Bella's arms around me, just to feel a moment of her lips on mine, just feel her love, because sometimes, you have to go through the pain to get the pleasure.

**The End!**


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